Saturday, May 22, 2010

Good Days and Bad Days

We all have good days and bad days.  Yesterday was a bad day.  My mom passed away at 5:41pm.  It was unexpected and sudden.  I will write the story later.  It's a little too fresh right now.  Basically her kidneys failed and caused all sorts of problems that she couldn't recover from.  She spent about 23 hours in the ER and ICU with nurses and doctors fighting for her to survive.  She had no idea she was in end stages of kidney disease.  She never complained of any symptoms or warning signs.  Apparently the shortness of breath and cough that she was experiencing the past week or two were a result of the kidney failure.  We thought she had bronchitis.  I will greatly miss her and the kids are going to miss their Nana.

Yesterday was a good day for my mom.  She was reunited with her dad and brother.  Before she passed, I told her to say hi to them for us and that we would see her later.  I told my kids that Nana was going to meet her grandma too.  She never met her grandma because she died before my mom was born.  Her name was Bertha.  The kids laughed when I said, "Nana is going to meet Big Bertha."

I'm glad she didn't have to suffer long.  I'm not sure I could've watched her much longer in that hospital bed, intubated and hooked up to so many machines.  I hardly recognized her.  When George was born 2 weeks early, my mom was disappointed that she missed seeing the new hospital during my stay.  As she gasped for breath while we waited for the ambulance to arrive at our house, I told her that she did not need to get sick to get to see the new hospital.  It got a small smile from her, but she looked scared.  Unfortunately she didn't get to see the happy floor with all the new babies. 

It makes a lot of sense that George was born early.  My mom was well enough her first week here to meet him, hold him, and fall in love with him.  It didn't make sense to me that he was 2 weeks early at the time he was born because the previous 5 were born about 2-4 days before their due date.  I know his early arrival was not a coincidence which is comforting.  I think my Heavenly Father had a plan to take my mom home when he did.  It was her time and I think George wanted to meet her before she left.  It just kind of sucks for us left behind.  She was great wife, mom, and Nana.

Yesterday was my parent's 44th wedding anniversary. They had exactly 44 wonderful years of marriage.  I don't have a picture of them together yesterday and if I did, I'm sure my mom would be very mad at me for posting it, so here is one from last year:

I love you, Mom!  Dang it, I'm going to miss you! I hope you can still read my blog in heaven!


  1. Melinda,
    I am so so so shocked at what I have just read. I remember your Mom and her kind and gentle manner. She was a wonderful woman. I am glad that you were able to see her again before she passed and that she was able to meet George. My prayers are with you, your dad and your family. With Sympathy, Joy (Hees) Springer

  2. Melinda I am so shocked and sad for you!!!! Let me help you! It's late at night now but I will call tmrw when you are awake much love

  3. I am so saddened by your loss. You are a strong, amazing woman. I know that no one will ever replace your wonderful mom, but you have dozens of sisters that love you!

  4. Melinda, Cherie was a wonderful mother, Nana & wife to your Dad. I am sad that you have lost your mother at such a young age and I know the children adored her. Know that my thoughts and prayers are with you. I will be here for you so please don't hesitate to call on me. I love you and my heart aches for you. love JoAn McDaniel

  5. Melinda
    I am so sorry. What a shock.
    You and your family are in our prayers.

  6. Melinda,
    I am so sorry; I thought at first I was reading it wrong on your facebook page. I'm glad that you have the gospel, but I will still be praying that you find the peace and strength you are going to need in the coming days, weeks, and months. Put that husband of yours to work and his priesthood; get as many blessings as you need! I'm glad that you had that time with her before she passed; I know you will always hold onto those memories!

  7. I'm so sorry for your loss Melinda. What a tragedy.

  8. I am more than sorry to hear of this loss. She must of been one AMAZING mother because she raised you and you are beyond amazing. I love your focus on the joy she must be feeling in heaven. I have a friend whose mother died when she was young and she always says her mom is an even better mom to her from heaven. I hope you will always be able to feel her mothering influence in you and the kids' lives. Hugs to you my friend-

  9. Melinda...
    Ever since you posted your comments on FB, I have been trying to figure out what happened and I finally got to your blog...
    Your strength and courage during these times is amazing. I admire you for that. I know that your mother raised a lovely talented young lady. I knew that the first time I met you and it is evident in how you are raising your amazing family.
    Much love to you always

  10. Melinda-
    There are no words to express how sorry I am for your loss. My Mom told me of your Mom's passing and I am finally read your blog. I feel very blessed to have known your Mom. She was an amazing women! Love you - Stacey Talbot

  11. Melinda, Tom, Renee & Kuhn family. I am so sorry for your loss. She was a second mother to me in my time at Pepperdine and I love her to this day for how generous she was to me and for how much she taught me about how to live the right way. My deepest condolences to you all. Rob Vogt

  12. Oh Melinda,
    I was so very sorry to hear of your mom's passing. I didn't know until yesterday. I got together with Kris Klafehn to put updates in the computer for the upcoming reunion on the 15th. I was just speechless when your mom's name was on the list of deaths. I surely would have come to the service to give you my sympathies in person had I known.

    So very young...I was looking forward to many more years of getting to know your mom.

    Don't know if you heard, but I lost my mom two weeks to the day after the last it will be a year in less than a month. I love to think that she is reunited with my dad and that they're on a long trip. They're just taking a really long time to get back! Mom was a widow for 27 years. I like to think of them together again. Thank you, Lord for heaven!

    I'll be thinking of you fondly and remembering your mom. The awesome person and mom that you are speaks volumes of the wonderful woman your mother was.

    Blessings to you and your family.
    your cousin,
    Debbie Vanderpool